Punk Column

Just when you thought punk was dead, buried and forgotten and it seemed only a glowing recession of unpaid credit and national distrust of the Government could possibly resurrect a generation of discontented youth…

Punk collective Vive Le Punk presents ‘77 band the Rezillos performing their album ‘Can’t Stand the Rezillos’ in its entirety. They play Edinburgh’s Liquid Rooms on the 22nd.

Dairy Crest, who own Country Life Butter and fronted a £5 million advertising campaign which featured John Lydon (Sex Pistols’ Johnny Rotten) have reported a drop of more than a quarter in its share prices after airing the commercial. Not sure they chose the best man to sell it to the masses…

BrewDog, a brewery in Fraserburgh, Scotland, is being investigated for encouraging irresponsible behaviour after launching Punk IPA and Hop Rocker. The main seller, Punk IPA, reads ‘this is an aggressive beer, we don’t care if you like it’ on the label. Co-founder of Brewdog defended his Punk beer label saying that the aggression was in reference to the taste rather than anything physical: “The word ‘aggressive’ is used because of the biting bitterness in it. It’s a heavily hopped beer. It’s not something you can drink a lot of.” 

‘Punk Rock Karaoke’ are set to release a new CD/DVD featuring guitarist Eric Melvin (NOFX), bassist Steve Soto (Adolescents), drummer Derek O’Brien (Social Distortion) and guitarist Greg Hetson (Bad Religion, Circle Jerks). The disc will spit out 10 tracks for you to shout along to, including tunes from Black Flag, Stiff Little Fingers, Dead Kennedys, Minor Threat and the Buzzcocks and comes out on October 28,2008. Flipper are re-releasing their albums on vinyl after a long period of them bring out of print.

There seems to be fuck all on in Edinburgh in the run-up to the Winter Festival. Perhaps all the punks have gone intro hibernation, using the chilly months to cultivate their hairstyles and nurture their spiky jackets. The alternative is that they are traveling en masse down to Sheffield or London, where Discharge will be bashing out their legendary d-beat noise. They’re flogging their new CD at the shows, so if you go down, pick up a copy and drop it by the Veritas office. A little birdie told me they may be playing in Scotland early next year. However, the birdie may be slightly unreliable as they are always wasted by 11 am, especially if it’s a week day.

Anyways, seeing as there isn’t really much to do, I suggest getting really drunk and going on the Ferris Wheel in Princes Street. Ten points if you manage to puke on a tourist. 20 points if it’s while you’re ice skating.

Originally published in Veritas December 2008 Issue 101. Co-written by Demian Hobby.

The Grit in Edinburgh

Photo: www.myspace.com/thegrit

Green and pink Mohawks dance above the heads of the crowd as a sweaty, dirty guy jumps on stand-up bass and slaps out a thundering bass line. The PA quivers and the air is damp with condensation, part sweat and part booze. The Grit are playing at the Three Tuns, a cellar bar in Edinburgh.

People sit in groups around unfeasibly small tables, drinking, talking and shouting. The band hasn’t started yet but no one has realized that there has been a delay. A girl does a circuit around the room, bellowing insults to her friends on the way to the bar. The gig is busy, but not completely full.

An hour after the scheduled start, two boys begin to hassle the girl on the door. Soon the rough chugging noise of a badly tuned guitar silences them and they bounce excitedly towards the front. A girl joins them, and they remain at the front of the crowd for the entire gig, dancing and laughing.

Running Riot are first to perform. Although young, they play a fast and hard set, barely pausing to breathe between songs. While most of the crowd hangs back, the three at the front wave their fists in the air and jump up and down, their spiked up hair bobbing up and down.

The frontman of Running Riot growls the last note of their set and they quickly pack up their things. The girl at the front leaves her spot and saunters over to the band. She speaks a few words of congratulation. The members of the band nod their heads in acceptance and she leaves to order a drink.

 The Grit start to set up and the crowd slowly begins to surge forward. The lead singer’s English accent burrs over the PA.

“All right? Good…”

The second guitarist finishes tuning up and with a nod the set begins. Dressed all in black, one with an impossibly high flat-top, another with a pink and black Mohawk, they fill the stage. After a few songs, the stand-up bass player spills out onto the dance floor. The air is moist and the girl at the front wipes sweat from under her eyes, smearing black makeup.

The crowd press forward onto the three people dancing, and the girl continues to dance with a full pint perfectly balanced in her hand. Only a few drops spill when a bondage-trouser clad boy smacks into her.

Again the crowd surges forward and those in front must press back against them to avoid crashing into the PA on the floor in front of the band. The bass player leaps onto his oversize bass and begins to strum the bass while standing on it. The girl at the front smudges the words ‘wash me’ onto the bass player’s dirty back with her finger.

The lead singer spews spittle and sweat into the air. The drummer, barely visible, crows to begin the last song. Most people join those at the front dancing, and their feet slip on the drink-sodden stone floor.

The sudden quiet is deafening, and almost sore. Friends shout to each other, not realizing their raised voices. The bartender calls last orders.

don’t teaze me please: punk rawk dj set @ burlesque night

ladies and gentlemen! the best-dressed, beautifully-tressed ebola nights punk rawk dj is performing tomorrow night at teaze burlesque night at carlton studios.

it’s a fiver in, and all proceeds go toward f.r.e.a.k., free reactive edinburgh art kollective. the burlesque starts at 9/9:30ish and the punk rock mayhem will be directly after the performance, in between 11:30 and 12.

i’ll be spinning all your favorites, plus some you didn’t realize were your favorites until you heard me blasting them through a big p.a.

there will be ’80s hardcore, ‘77 punk, anarcho, skacore, rawk n roll, psychobilly, thrash, oi, street… no overplayed ramones songs, and definitely no sex pistols or the clash.

i’m sure i heard you clamouring for a chance to see an old ebola nights flyers…

 well, squeeze me tight through-out the night and get the fuck out to the studios.

ACTHUNG! bands needed at rockers

rockers in glasgow are looking for bands for loadsa dates up until august to fill supporting slots. they also say they book up until december if yer a travelling kinda band. i’ve only been the once, to a remember chernoybl two-dayer, and from what i recall from a slightly hazy day it’s a good venue. it has all these shit hot old shirts tacked to the walls, totally makes you wanna go on a lifting spree.

anyways, that’s about it eh? down to the pub.

video killed the radio star: faslane peace camp looking for films

faslance peace camp have sent out a bulletin asking for any videos of the may 2 – 4 faslane baws tae bombs punx piknik. if ya headed up there and took any photos or videos, let them know. i couldn’t make it as it was my flatmate’s birthday party and i was in charge of the margaritas, but i heard the bands were really good.

they are also organizing a ‘freedom to protest’ demonstration this sunday.

“A peaceful demonstration is planned to assert our right to freely protest without fear. It will be held at 12pm on the 18th of May at Parliament Square, as a response to the campaign of harassment and intimidation which Lothian and Borders Police is directing at peaceful protsters in Edinburgh. Such repression violates human rights and, if it continues, it will stifle popular participation in civil society. The demonstration is also in solidarity with the dozens of working class people who are oppressed by the Edinburgh ‘justice’ system every day.”

for more information click here.

HEADS UP:

show at bannersmans tonight. doors 9pm. roughmute, kill youth culture, rsi and nasty nasty. not sure how much in, but it’s usually a fiver into the greasy vault that is bannermans.

teaze – alternative burlesque shenanigans. friday 23rd may. doors 9pm, first burlesque performance 10 pm, djs until 3 am. £5 in. it’s a fundraiser for f.r.e.a.k., an event which aims to create a temporary autonomous art space in a disused location. so not only will it be a good night, you can tick it off as your good deed for the day and proceed to knock down grannies with a bag of dead cats.

show at bannermans friday 23rd may. doors 9 pm. cute lepers (starring ex-briefs members steve e nix and stevie kicks [if ya dig that pop-punk shite, it makes my teeth hurt it's so sweet]), the begrudgers and the dirty pickups. fiver in.

dead kennedys at the liquid rooms 23rd may. £16.50 in. doesn’t say who’s supporting them or what time. i would body-swerve this one. if you are interested in my reasoning, check out my post below.

DELIBERATION OF THE DAY:

i don’t worry too much about the bomb – the madhouses are full enough. and i always remember after one of the best pieces of ass i ever had, i went to the bathroom and masturbated – hard to kill a man like that with a bomb – charles bukowski

TURN IT UP AND TUNE OUT:

cuz it’s friday, it’s sunny, you’re happy, i’m happy so it’s gotta be rkl – keep laughing. only released on vinyl, you can get a copy on cd complete with all the hisses and pops. this is totally their best recording. slam it and think… think positive!

ACTHUNG TEIL ZWEI! SHOW

apparently auslander are playing tonight at bannermans either as well or instead of someone… this is all via my edinburgh punk rock homing pigeon system, so it might be a bit garbled.

ACTHUNG! SHOW

just found out there is a show tonight so get yer stompin boots on and do yer hair just right…

bannermans. doors at 9. roughmute, kill youth culture, rsi and nasty nasty. not sure how much in, but it’s usually a fiver into the greasy vault that is bannermans.

dunno if i’ll make it, but you should totally go down to support roughmute. those fawkirk boys are good guys, and they are guaranteed to misbehave more than me, which is a feat unto itself.

word on the streets is they are looking for a new drummer, as cree is leaving to go to either trinidad and tobago or spain (their post says trinidad and tobago, my mate says they said spain and they are jokey cunts so we will probably never know the truth) to be a games tester (we think). regardless, they need a new drummer.

check out their song poondalita. while i originally thought it was a love song about a mexican chick, it’s actually a love song about cheap cider (poond a lita… geddit?) harhar.

s.x.p.p. all day… and all of the night…

for those of you krazy kats who didn’t mosey on down to carlton studios this sunday… ya didn’t miss much. i’m as honest as the day is long, so i’ll throw my hands up in the air and admit: yes, i was late (arriving at around four) and yes, i was already pished. but in regard to a punk gig, that should throw the balance in its favor, rather than against.

anyways, the line-up was a bit shit, especially considering it was almost twenty quid in! i think that’s the reason i got drunk beforehand, as sober catie would have never parted with that much cash.

anticlockwise were great, as usual. they are playing montpellier on may 18, being half fae scotland eh? and moitié de france oui? last time i remember them playing was november last year at that amazing free gig at the forest cafe. it was byob, and it’s funny how many friends you suddenly realize you have when you are in possesion of a three-liter bottle of frosty jack cider.

i missed critikill, but i have seen them play loads of times and as such would recommend them to friend or foe.

u.k. subs were ok. they are always good live, but i have seen them play in better venues (i.e. without a big fuck-off stage), with better line-ups (get the dude from the vibrators back, seriously) and with a better set list (i have to admit though, new york state police is always good live).

as to the rest of the bands… i can’t really remember them. oh demon alcohol, why must you plague me so?

in summation, pretty lackluster. there was hardly anyone there, and sunday is a super bad day to organize an all-dayer. however, it was extremely amusing to hear my flatmate from sunderland (does that make her sunderlandish? sunderlandonian? will have to enquire) shout ‘fuck off’ whenever a band from manchester attempted some rudimentary banter. i spent most of the time stomping about babbling to my mates and hardly paid any attention to the bands, which is really unlike me. i’m usually up at the front throwing bows and taking punches.

HEADS UP:

teaze – alternative burlesque shenanigans. friday 23rd may. doors 9pm, first burlesque performance 10 pm, djs until 3 am. £5 in. it’s a fundraiser for f.r.e.a.k., an event which aims to create a temporary autonomous art space in a disused location. so not only it will it be a good night, you can tick it off as your good deed for the day and proceed to knock down grannies with a bag of dead cats.

show at bannermans friday 23rd may. doors 9 pm. cute lepers (starring ex-briefs members steve e. nix and stevie kicks [if ya dig that pop-punk shite, it makes my teeth hurt it's so sweet]), the begruders and the dirty pickups. fiver in.

dead kennedys at the liquid rooms. £16.50 in. doesn’t say who’s supporting them or what time. i would body-swerve this one. if you are interested in my reasoning, check out my post below.

DELIBERATION OF THE DAY:

never trust anyone who has never seen the ocean – craig costorphine

TURN IT UP AND TUNE OUT:

f-minus – wake up screaming. they’re a nu-hardcore band, with fast, short songs with tinges of nausea thrown in. singer jen johnson, now in ammunition affair, belts out duets with brad logan that melt yer face. never live to see is the song on the album i’ll put back to the beginning like three times.

mdc: i remember all the stories i heard…

when i moved to scotland from the backwaters of anchorage, alaska at the ripe old age of 16, i almost imploded with delight at the prospect of seeing some of the bands i grew up listening to live. in alaska (as many of my never-ending stories start) the same three bands used to play every saturday night, perhaps with a different running order if they were feeling funky. in the two years i lived there, no major band played an all-ages show. while that meant the pit in most of the shows was completely mental, full of thrashing kids who knew all the words to all the songs, you couldn’t help but yearn for that band you dance to in front of your mirror to play a show.

but there is always a grey cloud accompanying the silver lining, and in my years living in edinburgh, i have had many unfortunate experiences of seeing a great band totally suck live. it doesn’t ruin the band’s music for me, but it slightly unravels the legend woven in my head.

then comes a great band whose live show pummels you. mdc are one of them. being a massive fan of ’80s hardcore, especially bands who live the message they preach, i shat myself when i found out they were playing a small pub in kirkcaldy. my mate nips and i jumped in his nissan micra hairdryer and made the roadtrip from edinburgh to kirkcaldy. using my honed navigation skills (i.e. holding the map the wrong way up until nips pointed out the words were upside down) we rocked up to the path tavern with massive cheesers spread across our face.

mdc were touring with three original members: dave dictor (vocals), ron ponser (guitar), and al schvitz (drums). some guy named mike smith was playing bass, i’m not sure of his relation to the band and who he’s played with before.

a couple of unrememberable bands played, edinburgh’s down to kill did a killer set and then the mandatory ’80s flag was hung up, and mdc assembled on stage…

…and kicked ass. barely pausing between songs, their 45 minute set had them all: john wayne was a nazi, i remember, dick for brains, i hate work, my family is a little wierd…. i danced the whole show and almost passed out, gasping for breath. once one classic ended, the next begun. every song was so tight, the p.a. was loud and the new bassist took the bass for a walk down main street.

at the end, i got a free shirt from dictor as i had been in the pit the whole time. i felt this was fair considering every bared inch of flesh was covered in greasy-metal-dude sweat from rubbing up against people. when i returned to edinburgh, i was still able to wring perspiration out of my shirt.

i’m getting goosebumps just recalling it all. it was perfect. i ended up going down to bolton, england, the next day to catch them again at the all-dayer.

moral of the story: don’t become a cynical bastard. you’ll never have fun.

HEADS UP:

show at bannermans friday 9 may. doors 8pm. certain death, peep show, the dirty pickups. £4 in. it’s a fundraiser for auld reekie roller girls with raffle prizes and a “cookie fest”.

s.x.p.p. all-dayer at carlton studios saturday 10 may. 12:30pm to 3am. loadsa bands with the u.k. subs headlining. £17 in. come get drunk.

DELIBERATION OF THE DAY:

passion has little to do with euphoria and everything to do with patience. it is not about feeling good. it is about endurance. like patience, passion comes from the same latin root: pati. it does not mean to flow with exuberance. it means to suffer. – mark z. danielewski

TURN IT UP AND TUNE OUT:

only cuz i totally have the taste for them now, but stick on mdc – millions of dead cops/more dead cops. once the bass line of the first version of john wayne was a nazi thuds on, you find you have to listen to it like 15 times.

edinburgh uber alles: dk to play liquid rooms

so just found that dead kennedys will be playing at the liquid rooms on friday may 23. i am djing at a burlesque night so i don’t think i’ll be able to catch the show.

they are touring to promote their new comp ‘milking the sacred cow’, which is available to buy in hard copy and also to download. the premise is that the comp’s playlist is the top ten downloaded dead kennedys songs. the only new songs on it are live versions of ’soup is good food’ and ‘jock-o-rama’, hardly a reason to spend $8.98 plus shipping or the same on a copy from itunes. the other hook is the promise of new artwork, but there is no way anything could live up to winston smith’s bad-acid-trip drawings forever associated with the band.

‘milking the sacred cow’? it doesn’t count as sarcasm if it’s true.

back in the day i would have totally freaked out and camped outside ripping records to get a ticket, but now i wouldn’t go see them even if i didn’t had something else to do. their most recent singer, jeff penalty, left the band in march of this year. on the dead kennedy’s website, they stated the split was due to scheduling conflicts but penalty described his departure from the band as “not amicable”. he mentions arguments about creative differences, whether or not they should appear on mtv (a ludicrous proposition from a band who penned ’mtv get off the air’) and about hiring a band manager whose stable of clients includes a christian folk singer (the song ‘religious vomit’ springs to mind).

penalty’s sign-off sums it all up: “and jello, you’ve been wrong about a lot of stuff, but you were certainly right about not trusting those guys… ” this is an allusion to the band’s six-year civil war over royalties and the rights to the band’s music. while i don’t think any party was totally right, you can’t help but seethe along with biafra when you hear about ’holiday in cambodia’ being featured in an edition of guitar hero. wtf?

the icing on the proverbial cake, dh peligro won’t even be manically banging the drums! he is apparently taking “personal time off”. one wonders if this has anything to do with penalty’s depature.

anyways, east bay ray and klaus flouride will be making an appearance, but from the sounds of it, they will be probably be requesting only evian water and blue m&ms in the dressing rooms.

i think i’ll be washing my hair that night.

go to ripping records for tickets (support independent, don’t buy from tickets scotland!)

HEADS UP:

show at Bannermans Friday 9th May. doors 8pm. certain death, peep show, the dirty pickups. £4 in. it’s a fundraiser for Auld Reekie Roller Girls with raffle prizes and a “cookie fest”.

s.x.p.p. all-dayer at carlton studios saturday 10 may. 12:30pm to 3am. loadsa bands with the u.k. subs headlining. £17 in. come get drunk.

DELIBERATION OF THE DAY:

in a secularised society of individuals it is no longer religion but celebrity that is the opium of the masses – j. dik

TURN IT UP AND TUNE OUT:

i’ve been burning a hole in my crass – penis envy cd. sometimes brushed aside as it is their feminist album and eve libertine does lead vocals, the beginning of bata motel kicks my ass every single time it blasts on.